Parental Stress and Difficulties Coping…
You’ve probably heard about the recent U.S. Surgeon General Advisory on parental stress. Parents and caregivers feeling stressed is not a new phenomenon. However, today’s levels of stress have parents at a breaking point, with 41 percent of parents saying that most days they feel so stressed they can’t even function (Murthy, 2024). More parents than ever before say they are stressed to a high degree, with almost 50 percent of parents reporting that “most days their stress is completely overwhelming compared to other adults” (Murthy, 2024).
There are numerous causes of this high parental stress. Of the concerns mentioned in the recent report, the following three are likely to greatly impact caregivers of young children:
1. Poverty and financial instability. Due to the intensive nature of taking care of babies and toddlers (who are very needy and cannot feed, clothe, or go to the toilet themselves), one parent is unable to work during this time unless childcare is paid for out of pocket. While other costs of living can be a challenge, the price of childcare has increased by about 26 percent in the past decade, causing significant financial strain for families (Murthy, 2024).
2. Time commitment. Caregivers of young children are busier than ever. Caregivers are spending more time working (over 20 hours more per week for mothers and almost 1.5 hours more for fathers since 1985) and taking care of children (almost 3.5 hours more per week for mothers and 4 hours more for fathers since 1985) (Murthy, 2024). Further stressed are the caregivers, sometimes referred to as “the sandwich generation.” Almost a quarter of U.S. adults care not only for a child (or adult child), but for an aging parent as well (Murthy, 2024). With the lack of comprehensive national infrastructure for either childcare or elder care in this country, that sandwich is often pressed into a panini, feeling pressure from all sides.
3. Isolation and lonliness. While everyone knows the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child,” modern life has left many caregivers of young children far from their extended families and without a village or community. This isolation and lack of social support can lead to increased stress for already stretched caregivers (Murthy, 2024).
Parental stress is particularly problematic for caregivers of very young children.
Babies and toddlers are unique because their brains are going through their most rapid period of development. During the first three years of life, a child’s brain forms more than 1 million new neural connections every single second (Murthy, 2024). These connections are strengthened through repeated positive experiences and help babies thrive and survive in their homes, wider communities, and broader culture.
This time of heightened growth is also one of intensive caregiving. As noted, babies are born completely helpless and quite needy. The foundational years of early brain architecture require caregivers of young children to have significant physical, emotional, and mental bandwidth to be attuned, responsive to the baby’s needs, and able to provide the “serve and return” interactions necessary to positively wire their child’s brain. Without this bandwidth, young children suffer.
It is well established that the mental health of caregivers affects the health and mental health of children—especially young children—as babies and toddlers rely on their caregivers to be calm and regulated in order to feel secure. When caregivers are supported, they can provide those safe, stable, and nurturing relationships and environments that set children on a trajectory where they will thrive (Murthy, 2024).
Parents who feel pushed to the brink deserve more than platitudes. They need tangible support.
How can parents get the support they need?
Providers and others who support families and caregivers of young children can “take care of the caregiver” by championing mental health support in several ways. Prevention of stress can be addressed through regular mental health screening, preventive care for mental health and stress management, and by providing added layers of support for those at high risk for mental health conditions (Murthy, 2024).
Additionally, caregivers benefit when professionals foster interdisciplinary connections between mental health providers and primary care and engage in partnerships with community organizations that provide parental care, resources, and support. These approaches, along with meaningful policy change such as paid family leave, guaranteed sick time, and more, will help create the necessary networks of support to alleviate the high amount of stress so many caregivers are feeling (Murthy, 2024).
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Article By: Rahil Briggs, Psy.D
References
Murthy, V. (2024, August 28). Parents Under Pressure: The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Mental Health & Well-Being of Parents. United States. Public Health Service. Office of the Surgeon General.